Hello friends, family, and internet strangers I have never met! Welcome to the blog! My tentative plan is to post an artistic update here on the website every month!

In the beginning of April I submitted three pieces to the Crossroads Carnegie Arts Center for my second ever gallery appearance! The theme of the show is “Heritage”. From their website:

“UNESCO perfectly defines heritage as “Our Open Regional Show Call to Artists – April 2022 Submission Guidelines legacy from the past, what we live with today, and what we pass on to future generations.” From a visual arts perspective, this can be expressed in so many wonderful ways. Is there scenery, or perhaps a story, that reminds you of the history of a location? Do you or your family have certain traditions that are passed on through generations? Are there any special heirlooms that mean a great deal to who you are as a person? Is there a message or legacy that you would like to have continue on for years to come? These are just a few of the possibilities that could be translated artistically for this theme show. We want each and every artist to feel as though they can express themselves freely through the idea of heritage, therefore we look forward to seeing as many creative interpretations of heritage as possible.”

When I first read this in their call to artists, my mind immediately went to my (at the time) most ambitious piece, Technicolor Cowboy.

This was a piece that I originally intended to have ready for my first show, the September Open Regional, at Crossroads. However, in true Lauren fashion, I did NOT dedicate enough time to have this painting ready for Septembers show. However, I think that worked out in my favor as this piece seems to fit with the theme of “heritage” quite well. Especially when you consider “Heritage” in the way that most folks do around her in Eastern Oregon, that way being COWBOY STUFFFFFFF. Gotta love cowboy stuff. I don’t really consider myself a cowboy aesthetic person.

I was born in Arizona, so of course my early childhood was spend around plenty of western motifs. I even have memories of participating in church rodeos as a kid (you’re reading the words of a woman who fell off of, and then was trampled on by, a running sheep as a child). But anyway, this sort of culture faded a bit once my family and I moved to central Indiana when I was 11. It only picked up again in my life when my own little family and I found ourselves in the beautiful mountain west. My husbands family has strong ties to farming, ranching, and agriculture and I’ve been really privileged to see and learn more firsthand of the proud heritage of the American West. This painting was made to be a tribute to that.

Anyway, after coming to the obvious conclusion that Technicolor Cowboy was gonna be in my submission, I was left with two more spots to fill in my set of three. Unlike “cowboy” these other two works were pieces of art specifically created with this show in mind.

In the pencil drawing “Grandmother Guymon” I was inspired by family history. Harriet Guymon Crandall was an ancestor that I was drawn to while reading about my Mormon Pioneer heritage. My fourth great grandmother, Harriet was an honest-to-goodness badass. Perhaps in another post I will go into more details about her life, but for now I will just say that I respect the hell out of this woman, and I really wanted to draw something to honor both her and her legacy.

Last but most certainly not least is my favorite thing I have ever painted….probably ever (of course this is subject to change!). “And My Mothers Were With Me” comes directly from a very powerful and very personal experience that I had both during and after the birth of my daughter. The quick version of the story goes as follows:

My labor started fast, and progressed even faster. The time from the first contraction to the moment my daughter was born was only a little less than three hours. For those who are unfamiliar, that is an INCREDIBLY fast labor. By the time we got to the hospital I was already in transition and my body was even beginning to push for me. Due to the relentless progression of my labor, I was unable to get any sort of pain relief whatsoever, which was a complete 180 from how I gave birth to my son.

I was induced  with my son, and I was even able to get an epidural before the real intense pains of labor started. To say I was out of my comfort zone is an understatement.

However, in this moment of my life, a moment where I had every single right to be afraid and to panic, I was calm. I felt an intense peace as I breathed through the waves of intensity. I wouldn’t even call it pain, really. I was able to remove myself from my own mind in such a way that I felt power, not panic. And as I laid there, clutching the side of the hospital bed, lost in my own little world, I sensed something.

First, the calm, strong, soothing presence of my husband. Bless the man, I basically ignored him during labor, however I can’t begin to explain how just his mere presence was able to help me. I really couldn’t have done it without him.

But beyond my husband there was another presence, a presence that I couldn’t see with physical sight. It was hazy at first, its almost like I was distracted by birthing a human out of my body or something…but then it came into focus with an intensity almost as strong as the labor itself.

I laid there, my daughter finally out of my body. The doctors rushed to get her airway cleared, and I was left to process what just happened to me. I was in shock; like, actual medical shock. And just as the fear was about to creep back into my mind I felt them.

It was as if the soul of every mother who ever lived, or ever would live, was at my side. They surrounded me, laying on their hands as if to control my uncontrollable shaking. They represented every nationality, every background, personality, body type, every aspect of humanity, everything. They were all beautiful. They knew me, and I felt as if I knew them. Their presence brought with them a love that filled the atmosphere with a divine intensity. Then, finally, my little daughter was placed in my arms. As I held her close they surrounded us even closer still, with love and pride on their faces, as if to say, “Well done.”

This piece means so much to me already, but over the past weeks as it has been on display (both in the gallery and on the internet) my feelings have grown even stronger. I have had so many women reach out to me to say that they too had similar spiritual experiences involving maternal, feminine presences. I hope that in this artwork I can inspire women to seek and find that sacred connection to our mothers, a connection that is all too often ignored in today’s world.

In conclusion, it has been a busy month! And April isn’t even over yet! But I really wanted to get this all written out. I think one of my favorite parts about being an artist is having a really concrete, physical proof of how your skill improves over the years. I hope that through this blog and by actually showcasing my work instead of just hiding it at home, I can see the journey my artistic career takes. Thank you for being here for it!!

Much love,

Lauren